It’s always nice to learn new things from clients! Some guys are
so smart. You never know when a new nugget of information will
drop down on you at your job. Sometimes literally! Like today, I
learned all about how tough this economy is as wealthy businessmen
dunked chicken nuggets into the ketchup that was pooled in my belly
button!
Over the course of the meal I learned all about the dangers of short
selling, legal fees accrued by mergers and acquisitions, and the
hottest new real estate markets to invest in-as it turns out, my
neighborhood “has a lot of potential!”. That’s wild, because it’s the
only neighborhood I can afford to live in. I had to laugh at one point
when learning about how one client is having to resort to liquidation,
because that was the very moment he dipped his finger in the “liquid”
mayonnaise over my nipples, noisily slurped it off, then double-dipped
into the peanut sauce in my hair. It’s true-the economy is starting to
get bad!
Since the meal was over 3 hours long I had a bit of time to reflect on
my own situation and think critically about what I was hearing. I
thought back to when I decided to get a master’s degree in theater
from NYU while still paying off my student loans from my bachelor’s
degree from University of Virginia, which is a public school that I
attended as an out-of-state student. It’s funny how no one told me
what a bad decision that was. In fact, everyone either covertly or
overtly encouraged me to get as much education as possible, regardless
of its practical application in the real world. It was so funny I
started to laugh, and the business men shouted at me to stop laughing
or the sashimi would fall off my stomach!
It got me thinking about money-where does it go? I guess it just
disappears sometimes. Because I’m only getting paid $11 per hour, and
these guys paid over $1000 each- is that why accounting firms and
other white collar industries charge so much money, to keep track of
all of that money that keeps going missing?
Huh! That’s a lot to chew on-literally! I kid, because I’m not allowed
to eat. My boss (I’ve never actually seen him!) says the big boys like
it when juices and sauces get caught in the crevices beside my hip
bones. I would ask the doctor working on the corned beef on my left
thigh if this was healthy, but he doesn’t accept my insurance!
I’m a dude, by the way.